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Rumors for February 1, 2008


Public Knowledge

  • The Daily Dirge [.doc]: Police Confirm Hernandez Strangled; Blood on the Streets in Staten Island; NYPD Shakeup; Commissioner Johnson Found Dead; Giuliani Concedes Presidential Race

  • Super Amazingly Truthful Awesome News [.jpg]: Tom Cruise to Anonymous: Hack This!; Scientologists Retaliate Against Anonymous Hacker Attacks; EMP Weapons Cause Internet Failure Across Two Continents

Sect and Clan

  • Trouble at Club Sebau (Clan is equal to Followers of Set): The Great Lord Helgiormir has made it known through Simon that he is displeased. Some meddling fools have been calling the mortal police reporting drug use and prostitution in his club. Either someone is meddling in the club, or someone is doing these things in his domain without his permission. Whichever it is, it displeases him. It would further upset him if he had to deal with the problem himself. However, if someone (one of you) were to address this problem, it would be remembered.


  • Mystery Box (Personal for Helen Rogerson): Shortly after sunset Thursday, a van pulled up outside of Elysium. A masked man wearing all black jumped out carrying a box that he quickly unfolded right outside the gate. He can be seen muttering and making odd hand gestures for a few seconds before sprinkling something around the box. Finally, he smashed a vial on the collapsed box, jumped back into the car and drove away.


  • Bureaucracy x1: February! Yes! This is my favorite month. Why? No holidays! No special events, no special permits. Ahhhhh. Sweet, sweet doldrums.

  • Bureaucracy x2: There's some extra rezoning work going on for anyone who wants extra overtime.

  • Bureaucracy x3: A new 'clarification' to public records laws got pushed through city hall. They dropped the fees we're allowed to charge below what we need to keep the staff to respond to the requests we already had! Let alone let us hire new staff to deal with the changes! And made it so we have to turn them around quicker!

  • Bureaucracy x4: Those jerks at city hall really have no conception what it takes to implement something like this. Someone waves some contributions in front of their face or threatens to withhold funding and *bam*, new administrative change on the books without a thought about its feasibility.

    That club finally got whatever permits they were after.

  • Bureaucracy x2: The HUD and Zoning Commission are both still working with that company that's helping them update their records. The HUD has even gone so far as to give this company a trial period for a potential longer-term contract.

    Why do the feds even care about New York City's public records policies?

    That club, the Sebau - they got permits for some serious security measures... don't know what they're worried about...


  • Church x1: The collections process at First Methodist Church in Queens was interrupted when the bowl was stolen partway through. The thief got away with at least $2,000.

    There continues to be a big push from the pulpit about the dangers posed by 'radical Islamic fundamentalists,' who are blamed for the 11-9 terrorist attacks. Church-goers are warned, however, not to confuse the acts and views of a few radicals with those of the large, peaceful majority of Muslims.

    People are encouraged to work with the police in solving these and other terrorism cases, be patient and accept a few temporary and regrettable infringements on traditionally respected privileges so that the police may more efficiently track down the killers and terrorists. After all, people have a civil right to life that must, at times, override the other rights.

  • Church x2: In fact, there are a suspiciously large number of very similar sermons/talks given across a range of religious denominations.


  • Finance x1: Recession looms. Opinions are all over the place. Do we sell? Save? Buy? Shit, goddammit. Shit. How am I supposed to afford a second house in this economy?

    Through it all, though, Vontaug stock continues to perform. They're still climbing, back up at over $100/share these days.

  • Finance x2: Vontaug's price has been fairly constant in the $110-$115 range for a few weeks now. Hard to believe that it's still going so hot.

  • Finance x3: Some analysts are throwing around the D word. This might get really, really bad.

  • Finance x4: Most of the blame is heading towards the Fed, and poor budget management on a widespread national level, but really, it's the small problems that are making it.

  • Finance x5: National culture of debt, trillion dollar war with no end in sight, poor consumer and investor confidence. This is a sad day for us equity bankers. Oh well. Time to buy out some Mexican banks.

  • Finance x6: Some bigwigs are still putting money into Vontaug, some are taking it out. Someone was poking around that horrible club, the Aspis, again.

  • Finance x7: Why, it was the owner of the place, Mona Ramsey. She's been missing for a while.


  • Health x1: A few new John Does came in from a ditch in Central Park. No results yet from the autopsies.

    The blood drives continue to be a running success. Shortages are getting close all-time lows. This is wonderful!

  • Health x2: There has been a whole lot of volunteer support for the blood drives, which is most of the reason that they're going so well. Plans are being made for a big gala in the spring to celebrate.

  • Health x3: The Does all died of the same cause, it appears, and non-violently. It's quite bizarre.

  • Health x4: Early results indicate massive overdoses on some dangerous illegal drugs.

  • Health x5: It was a mix of sempreverde, marijuana, and ecstasy. Apparently, each one of their hearts ruptured and they died of massive internal blood loss.

High Society

  • High Society x1: With only one good party date to think about in February, it's the time to rest, and the time to plan. Valentine's Day is just so easy.

  • High Society x2: It's also the time to focus on sculpting a perfect body for the spring yacht party season. Get to work!

  • High Society x3: God, WHY hasn't anyone invented weather control yet? I'm in such good shape, I could do a beach party right now, but I can't leave town.

  • High Society x4: Someone was poking around that horrible club, the Aspis, again.

    Why can't I leave town? Well, I mean, it's just. Not possible. I can't! I've got too much invested in the people here!

  • High Society x5: Why, it was the owner of the place, Mona Ramsey. She's been missing for a while.

    Plus I'm making progress with my boss. Rowr.

  • High Society x6: She was there to recover her personal possessions.


  • Industry x1: Holiday season is long past. Recession is looming. Guys are probably lose their jobs.

    February sucks.

  • Industry x2: This is going to be a tough season. Times are changing fast.

  • Industry x4: Vontaug is thriving. Maybe I should go work for them, hmm?


  • Legal x1: Does anyone have more info on those dead men from Central Park? I think I can make a class action case out of it.

  • Legal x3: I hear they were some kind of suicide cult. Don't ask where I heard that, but I did. Makes the class action bit more nuanced.

  • Legal x5: Someone was going through the old databases looking for Hadrian Evans.


  • Media x1: Super Tuesday's coming up. Be ready to make a shitstorm outta that, because otherwise February's gonna be slow as hell.

  • Media x2: The primary race is the only good news going on. I'm so tired of covering anything else.

  • Media x3: I love Hillary, but there's been some really awful news coming out. Obama's supporters are starting to expose some of her dirty campaigning. What am I supposed to do about it?

  • Media x4: This little company has been offering a discount to writers at the Dirge for fact-checking their articles.

  • Media x5: That fact-checking is coming in handy. It's mostly low-level writers, but the quality of their articles is going up. What was the company's name again? Something like "Truth in Writing."

    The new rules weren't put through by any of the journalist groups or freedom of information types...

  • Media x6: It's "Truth in Words."


  • Occult x1: Seems like part of the Gnostic Order of Riddles went and disappeared in Central Park.

  • Occult x2: Aw shit. They went and tried the X-Gravity-Sempre combo. I think they died. Did they die?

  • Occult x3: They died. Yep. Poor dumbasses.

  • Occult x4: Someone's been trying to get an in on practicing hermetic groups. Looks like they may have found something.

  • Occult x5: They seem to have hooked up with that little group in the East Village.

  • Occult x6: That East Village group is called the Order of Solomon's Wisdom. Only in Latin or something.


  • Police x1: Some poor sap found a bunch of blood-covered bodies in Central Park. He's traumatized. They've got him in a psych ward at the State PD.

    Police Commissioner Matthew Johnson and his wife Maureen died Wednesday, seemingly in his sleep. He will be replaced by Raymond Kelley.

    The Reorganization continues. It seems even the death of the commissioner cannot stop the march of new org tables...

  • Police x2: How the hell did those people die? Normally the anomalous, inexplicable deaths involve exsanguination or dismemberment, not a group of John Does covered in blood with no murder weapons, motives, or causes in sight.

    There are rumors of foul play surrounding the deaths of Commissioner Johnson and his wife. There were apparently signs of a struggle, but there is no indication of forced entry.

  • Police x3: We're still waiting on the autopsy results, though. Might not be so inexplicable.

    Both Commissioner Johnson and his wife were apparently strangled, but it is not clear how or why.

    Some people are hoping that Johnson's death will have some mitigating effect on the reorg push. Seems he had gotten quite involved in the process.

  • Police x4: There was a big bust on some operation in Queens. The department's feeling pretty awesome about that - everything went almost perfectly.

    There have been a lot of calls regarding suspected drug sales and prostitution at at club called the Sebau. So far, no one has really looked into it, but with the Staten Island situation, the ongoing reorganization and the death of the Commissioner, that is not really surprising.

    Although both Johnsons were strangled, the marks on their necks are not consistent with someone strangling them with their hands. Instead, it appears some kind of large cord or small tubing was used, but no such object was found in the residence.

  • Police x5: The bust was on a solid money laundering group. An anonymous tipster - probably an insider - sent us some priceless information.

    Johnson's death has put on hold several personnel shifts at high levels in the NYPD. Nothing had been made official yet, but scuttlebutt had it some of the VIPs might have to drop down to being just IPs, or might be 'retired'.

  • Police x6: We got a few big fish in the bust; I hear Money Laundering Carlo was caught. Seems like we're pumping him for all the dirt we can get on everyone else.


  • Politics x1: The primaries continue. Edwards drops out, Giuliani drops out. The way I see it, this race is basically between Clinton and Obama.

  • Politics x2: Does anyone really think the Repubs have a chance? This consultant doesn't. My conservative values aren't worth missing out on a fat bonus when Clinton wins, and she needs help. I'm defecting.

  • Politics x3: A few of the big lobbyists in the area have been attending Clinton fundraisers. Makes sense, there's no way she's not winning New York.

    A new 'clarification' to public records laws got pushed through city hall. It reduced the fees required to get public records and shortened the necessary response time.

  • Politics x4: One lobbyist in particular, some DC guy from the stem cell research lobby, has been showing at quite a lot of them.

    Slipped the new change in as a rider on a budget amendment. Hope that makes those bastards happy.

  • Politics x5: That stem cell research lobbyist seems to be taking the opportunity to network a bit in the local and state sectors.

    I don't know why the feds keep pushing this kind of bureaucratic bullshit.

  • Politics x6: The stem cell research lobbyist's name is Seth Samuel.


  • Street x1: Winter's coming to an end, slowly. Hang in there. Kitchens and sandwich trucks are everywhere, so don't let yourself go hungry.

    Anyone else hear about the bodies found in Central Park?

  • Street x2: There's a bunch of kitchens that have been so much less preachy and dumb than the rest recently. Younger servers who actually listen, and it's just ... it's good.

    Like, seriously. I keep hearing about these bodies. What's the deal?

  • Street x3: Certain guys have been organizing trips to those kitchens. They've really got good heads for what's a good place.

    Staten is coming out with good ideas for surviving in the alleys and panhandling.

  • Street x4: These soup guys say they've got hookups on places to stay, and jobs too. I believe 'em.

    It's mostly the kids on Staten that have the new ideas - apparently just a handful learned some tricks and they spread like wildfire.

    Apparently there's some guy who continues to hire out a few of the homeless to have some people tailed. Creepy, huh?

  • Street x5: The kids are alright. They've got some kind of teacher. Must be an experienced old timer trying to pass on their skills to the next generation.

    There are four people being tailed are, the most notable one being a a short menacing Asian man who constantly wears a sweater vest and a bow tie and has a penchant for loud music.

    There's a bit of unease... apparently some of these guys were moving something fairly big in a duffelbag late at night.


  • Transportation x1: Winter's rolling out. Operations should be getting smoother as February and March go by.

  • Transportation x3: There's still somebody keeping quiet observation on some subway patrons. Nobody can talk much though. Word goes that it's terrorism suspects.

  • Transportation x5: The four people being trailed are: a young Eastern European woman of very short stature; a one-eyed Caucasian male; a very tall, very well muscled Caucasian male; and a short menacing Asian man who constantly wears a sweater vest and a bow tie. The woman and the Asian man haven't been spotted for a while, though.


  • Underworld x1: Everybody fucking lay low. This is fucking serious. Fucking, FUCK because everyone's getting fucking nailed.

  • Underworld x2: But seriously, there was a big bust recently in Queens. Pinpoint work, they had to have an inside man. Everybody lay low and flush for undercovers.

  • Underworld x3: The bust was on a solid money laundering group. They'd done quality work for a couple big names, never had any trouble. Someone definitely snitched. This is bad.

  • Underworld x4: Money Laundering Carlos' group was taken in the bust. He's got dirt on everyone. Everyone! He was good at his job, but this might mean we'll have to, you know. Take him off the stand.

  • Underworld x5: Carlo can pin sempre guys all over the fucking city. We've gotta take him out. Also, we gotta find whoever ratted him out so we don't lose another good operation.


  • University x1: Spring semester! Planning for spring break! Woooyeahh!

    Lots to look forward to.

  • University x2: Some student organizations are running an awareness fundraiser for the AIDS crisis in South Africa.

  • University x3: Apparently, there was a scheduling situation with the AIDS fundraiser due to some pipes that had burst in the building. Fortunately, it got resolved.

    A couple of students have been going down to some soup kitchens recently to help out the homeless. Apparently it's faculty sponsored.

  • University x4: The plumbers are working on the piping problem that happened in the ballroom that the AIDS fundraiser was going to be in, so we'll have it back in a month. Make sure to thank the desk lady at the student union who managed to fix things up!

    There was a bit of special incentive for the soup-kitchen project - some kind of extra credit given by the sponsoring professors or something.

  • University x5: The extra credit was worth an exam in some class if the student turned in a paper on one of the people they met while working or something.

  • University x6: Apparently, the professor behind this soup-kitchen project also tried to get this project approved for some kind of special credit. No one knows yet what's happening with that.

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